23 Life Changing Lessons to Learn from Dalai Lama

1. The world doesn’t belong to leaders. The world belongs to the whole humanity.

“World belongs to humanity, not this leader, that leader or that king or prince or religious leader. World belongs to humanity. “
“I always believe the rule by king or official leader is outdated. Now we must catch up with the modern world.”

2. Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.

“I don’t know whether the universe, with its countless galaxies, stars and planets, has a deeper meaning or not, but at the very least, it is clear that we humans who live on this earth face the task of making a happy life for ourselves. Therefore, it is important to discover what will bring about the greatest degree of happiness.”
“I believe compassion to be one of the few things we can practice that will bring immediate and long-term happiness to our lives. I’m not talking about the short-term gratification of pleasures like sex, drugs or gambling (though I’m not knocking them), but something that will bring true and lasting happiness. The kind that sticks.” 

3. The essence of any religion is good heart.

“We can reject everything else: religion, ideology, all received wisdom. But we cannot escape the necessity of love and compassion…. This, then, is my true religion, my simple faith. In this sense, there is no need for temple or church, for mosque or synagogue, no need for complicated philosophy, doctrine or dogma. Our own heart, our own mind, is the temple. The doctrine is compassion. Love for others and respect for their rights and dignity, no matter who or what they are: ultimately these are all we need. So long as we practice these in our daily lives, then no matter if we are learned or unlearned, whether we believe in Buddha or God, or follow some other religion or none at all, as long as we have compassion for others and conduct ourselves with restraint out of a sense of responsibility, there is no doubt we will be happy.” 
“Love and Compassion are the true religions to me. But to develop this, we do not need to believe in any religion.”
“Compassion is not religious business, it is human business, it is not luxury, it is essential for our own peace and mental stability, it is essential for human survival.”
“The essence of any religion is good heart. Sometimes I call love and compassion a universal religion. This is my religion.”

4. If you realize that you have enough, you are truly rich.

“When you are discontent, you always want more, more, more. Your desire can never be satisfied. But when you practice contentment, you can say to yourself, ‘Oh yes – I already have everything that I really need.”
“We need to learn how to want what we have NOT to have what we want in order to get steady and stable Happiness”

5. Your Home is where you feel at home.

“Home is where you feel at home and are treated well.”

6. In the middle of every difficulty lies an opportunity for growth. 

“When we meet real tragedy in life, we can react in two ways – either by losing hope and falling into self-destructive habits, or by using the challenge to find our inner strength. Thanks to the teachings of Buddha, I have been able to take this second way. “
“Hard times build determination and inner strength. Through them we can also come to appreciate the uselessness of anger. Instead of getting angry nurture a deep caring and respect for troublemakers because by creating such trying circumstances they provide us with invaluable opportunities to practice tolerance and patience.”

7. Life is too short to be anything but happy.

“Given the scale of life in the cosmos, one human life is no more than a tiny blip. Each one of us is a just visitor to this planet, a guest, who will only stay for a limited time. What greater folly could there be than to spend this short time alone, unhappy or in conflict with our companions? Far better, surely, to use our short time here in living a meaningful life, enriched by our sense of connection with others and being of service to them.”
“With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world.”

8. It’s okay if you get angry from time to time.

“As a human being, anger is a part of our mind. Irritation also part of our mind. But you can do – anger come, go. Never keep in your sort of – your inner world, then create a lot of suspicion, a lot of distrust, a lot of negative things, more worry.”
“Generally speaking, if a human being never shows anger, then I think something’s wrong. He’s not right in the brain.”
“I am sometimes sad when I hear the personal stories of Tibetan refugees who have been tortured or beaten. Some irritation, some anger comes. But it never lasts long. I always try to think at a deeper level, to find ways to console.”

9. You must not lose faith in humanity.

“Out of 6 billion humans, the troublemakers are just a handful.”
“Some mischievous people always there. Last several thousand years, always there. In future, also.”

10. Love everyone, be attached to no one.

“Old friends pass away, new friends appear. It is just like the days. An old day passes, a new day arrives. The important thing is to make it meaningful: a meaningful friend – or a meaningful day.”
“Give the ones you love wings to fly, roots to come back and reasons to stay.”

11. It’s not just your brain who needs to be developed, your warmheartedness needs that as well.

“I have always had this view about the modern education system: we pay attention to brain development, but the development of warmheartedness we take for granted.”
“If you have only education and knowledge and a lack of the other side, then you may not be a happy person, but a person of mental unrest, of frustration. Not only that, but if you combine these two, your whole life will be a constructive and happy life. And certainly you can make immense benefit for society and the betterment of humanity. That is one of my fundamental beliefs: that a good heart, a warm heart, a compassionate heart, is still teachable.”
“One problem with our current society is that we have an attitude towards education as if it is there to simply make you more clever, make you more ingenious… Even though our society does not emphasize this, the most important use of knowledge and education is to help us understand the importance of engaging in more wholesome actions and bringing about discipline within our minds. The proper utilization of our intelligence and knowledge is to effect changes from within to develop a good heart.”

12. Underneath it all we are all good, but not everyone lives life from that place.

“Of course, when I say that human nature is gentleness, it is not 100 percent so. Every human being has that nature, but there are many people acting against their nature, being false.”

13. The best way to resolve any problem is to sit down and talk.

“Non-violence means dialogue, using our language, the human language. Dialogue means compromise; respecting each other’s rights; in the spirit of reconciliation there is a real solution to conflict and disagreement. There is no hundred percent winner, no hundred percent loser—not that way but half-and-half. That is the practical way, the only way.”
“The best way to resolve any problem in the human world is for all sides to sit down and talk.”

14. Ignorance is anything but bliss.

“Where ignorance is our master, there is no possibility of real peace.”
“I believe all suffering is caused by ignorance. People inflict pain on others in the selfish pursuit of their happiness or satisfaction. Yet true happiness comes from a sense of inner peace and contentment, which in turn must be achieved through the cultivation of altruism, of love and compassion and elimination of ignorance, selfishness and greed.”
“We should reflect on the idea that since the beginning of time sentient beings have been mentally unstable because they have been slaves of delusion, they lack the eye of wisdom to see the path leading to nirvana and enlightenment, and they lack the necessary guidance of a spiritual teacher. Moment by moment they are indulging in negative actions, which will eventually bring about their downfall.”

15. You must not hate those who do wrong or harmful things.

“You must not hate those who do wrong or harmful things; but with compassion, you must do what you can to stop them — for they are harming themselves, as well as those who suffer from their actions.”

16. We are all different yet we are all the same.

“Whether one is rich or poor, educated or illiterate, religious or nonbelieving, man or woman, black, white, or brown, we are all the same. Physically, emotionally, and mentally, we are all equal. We all share basic needs for food, shelter, safety, and love. We all aspire to happiness and we all shun suffering. Each of us has hopes, worries, fears, and dreams. Each of us wants the best for our family and loved ones. We all experience pain when we suffer loss and joy when we achieve what we seek. On this fundamental level, religion, ethnicity, culture, and language make no difference.”
“Every single being, even those who are hostile to us, is just as afraid of suffering as we are, and seeks happiness in the same way we do. Every person has the same right as we do to be happy and not to suffer. So let’s take care of others wholeheartedly, of both our friends and our enemies. This is the basis for true compassion.”
“We discover that all human beings are just like us, so we are able to relate to them more easily. That generates a spirit of friendship in which there is less need to hide what we feel or what we are doing.”

17. You can create a dynamic impression not just by using words, but also by knowing when to be silent. 

“Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something, and sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent.”

18. Knowledge never decreases by being shared.

“Share your knowledge. It is a way to achieve immortality.”

19. If you contribute to other people’s happiness, you will find the true meaning of life.

“We are but visitors on this planet. We are here for ninety or one hundred years at the very most. During that period, we must try to do something good, something useful with our lives. If you contribute to other people’s happiness, you will find the true goal, the true meaning of life.”
“The ultimate source of happiness is not money and power, but warm-heartedness”

20. Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.

“Pain is inevitable,suffering is optional… we have bigger houses,but smaller families. More conveniences,but less time. We have knowledge,but less judgements; more experts,but more problems ; more medicines but less health.”

21. Urge people to investigate things, don’t command them to believe.

“Open-minded people tend to be interested in Buddhism because Buddha urged people to investigate things – he didn’t just command them to believe.”
“I will not propose to you that my way is best. The decision is up to you. If you find some point which may be suitable to you, then you can carry out experiments for yourself. If you find that it is of no use, then you can discard it.”

22. Your task is not to be better than anyone else. Your task is to be better than you used to be.

“The goal is not to be better than the other man, but your previous self.”

23. If we do not combine science and these basic human values, then scientific knowledge may sometimes create troubles, even disaster…

“It seems that scientific research reaches deeper and deeper. But it also seems that more and more people, at least scientists, are beginning to realize that the spiritual factor is important. I say ‘spiritual’ without meaning any particular religion or faith, just simple warmhearted compassion, human affection, and gentleness. It is as if such warmhearted people are a bit more humble, a little bit more content. I consider spiritual values primary, and religion secondary. As I see it, the various religions strengthen these basic human qualities. As a practitioner of Buddhism, my practice of compassion and my practice of Buddhism are actually one and the same. But the practice of compassion does not require religious devotion or religious faith; it can be independent from the practice of religion. Therefore, the ultimate source of happiness for human soci
ety very much depends on the human spirit, on spiritual values. If we do not combine science and these basic human values, then scientific knowledge may sometimes create troubles, even disaster….”

10 Things You Need to Stop Doing for a Happier Life

Don’t we all seem to be endlessly searching for happiness? Sometimes we blame circumstances or people for the things that make us feel otherwise, when in fact it all starts within ourselves. It all begins within our own minds.
If you feel like your search for happiness never ends, and all you wish for is to finally be happy, look deep inside yourself and examine whether you’re embracing any of the traits or thoughts mentioned below. If you are, start working to get rid of them so that you can welcome more happiness into your life.

1. Being jealous

If you are comparing yourself to others as a way to inspire yourself to work harder and become a better person, that’s a good thing. However, if you let other people’s success become a burning fire in your mind, you will feel unhappy.
Looking up to successful people can be a benchmark for success and an opportunity to learn, grow, and prosper. You can learn from their strategies and cultivate your strengths. But remind yourself not to feel envious. This does nothing but keep yourself dwelling on that envious feeling, which is only a waste of time, energy, and peace of mind.

2. Fearing change

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
- Albert Einstein
Change is scary, because it’s not what you’re used to. It’s uncomfortable, and it doesn’t make you feel secure or certain. However, the unknown that comes with change can actually bring excitement and opportunities. Take a leap of faith in yourself and believe that change will lead you to a better place than you were in yesterday.
Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.
- Jim Rohn
Whether it’s changing jobs, leaving people, or moving to another country, as long as you follow your intuition and do what feels right, you will be fine.
Remembering you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose.
- Steve Jobs
Embrace change. The best is yet to come.

3. Needing to be in control

Many people expect things to go as planned and want to be in control. However, when things don’t go as planned, they feel sad, disappointed, and unhappy.
In fact, the most certain thing in life is uncertainty. The only constant in life is change.
Therefore, if you want to be happy, you need to learn to let go. You need to learn to live without trying to control your life. Because the minute you try to control it, you become dependent on the feeling of control - which makes you lose control of yourself.
You can plan for the best. However, no matter how things turn out, you need to accept them. Be resilient. Go with the flow. That’s the way to live life with peace of mind.

4. Overworking

Because you want to be successful and rich, you work hard — sometimes harder than you should. You forget to have a work-life balance. Eventually you will regret wasting the things that you cannot get back, such as spending time with family and close friends. Remember, happiness is only real when shared. Don’t forget to cherish meaningful relationships in your life.

5. Blaming others and finding excuses

When problems arise, many of us find excuses or blame external things. Change your perspective. Instead of finding excuses, focus on finding solutions to the problem.

6. Complaining and whining

Instead of complaining, whining, or criticizing things, change your perspective. Start by taking a deep breath in. Be mindful of your thoughts, actions, and emotions. Then look at the root of the problem and think about how you can fix it. If you deal with problems in life this way, you will fill yourself with optimism and positive energy, and you will become a lot happier.

7. Believing that you’re always right

No one is a master of everything. No one is perfect. If you’re always scared that you’re not perfect, you will never be happy. Let it go. Accept all that you are. Understand that you are not and will never always be right.

8. Not believing in yourself

Some people believe in the word “can’t.” They believe that they are incapable of doing things. They always say: I can’t do this. This is all I can do. That’s it. I can’t do or get any better. This kind of thinking is the biggest obstacle in life. It’s the obstacle that blocks you from doing the things you love and from reaching your fullest potential.

9. Keeping bad friends around

Humans are social animals. We are influenced by our environment, whether we are aware of it or not. The important thing to be aware of is that good friends will lift you up and bad friends will drag you down. Pick your friends wisely.

10. Living in the past

Your past is filled with good and bad experiences which shape who you are. However, your head space should not be so stuck in the past — in past failures and disappointments — that you cannot move forward. You need to learn to let go and focus on building new beginnings and a beautiful future.

Image credit www.ae-erlebnisreisen.de

5 Limits That Will Launch Your Success

If you want to improve your success, consider these five limits:

1. Limit yes

We have a limited amount of time and energy, so limit yes to the instances where you can say, “Hell Yes.” Otherwise, you waste precious energy on uninspired people and activities.
If someone invites you to waste time or do the same thing with the same people, whip out that no. Don’t be shy, because no is the only thing standing between you and an extraordinary life; it is one of your strongest limits. If the thing in question conflicts with your need to grow, or your personal time, flex that no.
“Thanks for thinking of me, but no. I have other plans.” Nothing more needs to be said; no apologies required. You can’t be happy saying yes when you’re sorry saying no.
“Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them.”  Albenrt Einstein

2. Limit external directives

Tired of your days being hijacked by emails, social media, and text messages? Try limiting how much time you spend looking outside for direction. When in doubt, look within. Your life and your dreams are decided by two things:
  1. The amount of quality time spent reflecting on what is best for you and the people you love. And
  2. The amount of undistracted time you have to focus and unleash creative energy in pure, productive flow.
Facebook doesn’t know what is best for you. Or at least, I don’t think they have an algorithm for that yet. Any person who emails you certainly won’t be the master designer of your life plans.  Your highest achievements are decided by you and you alone, so limit things that distract you from you.

3. Limit information

Information: what you take in shapes your formation. It is the substance of entertainment, from music, to television, to movies and books; all of which are forming who we are every moment.  
We are consuming information more rapidly than ever, but when that information is bad, it consumes us. After I looked back on my failed relationships, I saw that I regurgitated the idea of romance that is portrayed in music and movies. And I paid for that information.
So take a good look at what you want your success to be. Then compare that life to the information you consume. If there is a conflict, make the choice that favors your highest development no matter how hard that may be. Limit your information to the stuff that inspires you to succeed, to be adventurous, to take smart risks, and to improve your character.

4. Limit friendships

Limit friendships to the people who challenge you to grow, and who inspire you to be a better person. This one is extremely difficult to do, but it will lead to your greatest breakthroughs in life.
We form such devoted attachments to our friends through emotional experiences, intellectual similarity, and mutual good will. But when we become so attached to friends who live uninspired lives, their behavior informs our character.
So choose friends whose freedom you want to emulate; otherwise, they’ll restrict your potential to succeed. Choose friends you feel uncomfortable being stagnant around, and encouraged to succeed by. With good friends, you’ll create an invaluable culture of success to grow in.

5. Limit definitions

This one seems like a no-brainer because definitions, by definition, are limited. But mass opinion has a strange and morbid effect on common sense.
Take success, for instance. How many people go on to accomplish every business goal they dreamed of only to lose their families and happiness? How many millionaires “succeeded” at the cost of personal joy and satisfaction?
Take the time to redefine success (and any other important word to you). Make success holistic, and have it include your goals for family life, love, play, work, income, lifestyle, and any other facet of life that involves your happiness. Then you won’t sacrifice the good life for your business “success.”
“There’s no limit to what free men and free women in a free market with free enterprise can accomplish when people are free to follow their dream.” – Jack Kemp
If your life is an engine, then limits are the valves and pistons strategically placed to keep you moving forward. If you’ve been spinning your wheels when it comes to success, take a deeper look at the limits that can set you free.

source addicted2success

TEN WAYS HELPING OTHERS WILL IMPROVE YOUR LIFE

“We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.” ― Winston Churchill

It’s easy to focus all your time and energy on what you have and what you want. That self-focus can increase when you’re faced with personal or professional challenges. You put your head down, think about what needs to get done, and work harder or faster to get through a rough patch. You might cut yourself off from friends and the community, saying you’ll get back to them when things take a turn for the better.
But what happens when you take the opposite approach? When you reach out to help others, even when you’re not sure precisely what you have to give? This can take the form of volunteering with a local charity or simply helping a colleague at work when you don’t need to.
A growing deluge of research shows that helping and giving can make you feel connected, grow in new ways and even live longer. Here are 10 ways helping others can also help you.

1. Helping makes you feel connected.

By engaging with other individuals and communities, you feel more connected to other people. Humans are social by nature–which means we need relationships for optimal psychological health. Connecting with others fulfills a need we all have but sometimes ignore. Beyond just the one-on-one connections, helping address a bigger issue or cause (like a charity that aims to reduce homelessness, or improve nutrition in low-income children, or provide greater access to education) can make you feel like a needed part of the world.

2. Helping can build new skills.

Over time, helping others can help you build new skill sets — especially if your activities lie outside your wheelhouse. Say you’re a bank teller and you volunteer in a completely different area: on an event planning committee for a local charity. You might already be good at managing people, but by engaging in this work you’ll build new skills in juggling competing timelines, working with vendors, and marketing.

3. Helping makes you grateful.

Helping others facing their own challenges can put yours into perspective. This is particularly true if your ‘problems’ are small by comparison. It’s easy to take things like health, shelter or family for granted until you spend time with people living in profoundly difficult situations. Use these opportunities to cultivate gratitude and inspire you to make the most of what you have.

4. Helping creates new relationships — and improves the ones you have.

Helping in the community can get you out of your usual social circles and introduce you to new people. Many of these individuals may become friends, mentors or colleagues. Besides leading to new relationships, being generous can have spillover affects that benefit your current relationships. When your helping mindset results in better interactions with your significant other, family and co-workers, everyone benefits.

5. Helping makes you live longer.

This in itself should be a major motivator! Various studies have found that the ‘warm fuzzy’ feeling we get by helping has real physiological effects — and they pay off in the long-term. In particular, those who ‘help’ consistently tend to live longer than those who don’t; and they report lower blood pressure, less depression, lower stress and greater happiness while doing it.

6. Helping can expand your identity.

Did anyone ever say ‘don’t put all your eggs in one basket’? Psychology has shown that when you focus too myopically on one dream or goal or dimension of your life, setbacks in that area can be huge blows. Having a multi-faceted identity — for instance, as a manager, a parent, a community member, a volunteer — can enrich your sense of self and give you more areas of joy. And, when setbacks happen in one area, they’re not nearly as debilitating.

7. Helping builds your reputation as a giver.

When others start to see you as someone who’s generous and who makes a contribution beyond their immediate sphere, more people come to you with requests. This is really a good thing — as many requests are opportunities in disguise. Over time, being seen as a consistent ‘helper’ can open new personal and professional doors you never could have imagined.

8. Helping boosts your self-esteem.

And really, who can’t use an extra dose confidence in these unpredictable times? By truly helping — making others better off through our interventions — you can see yourself having impact (what researchers call ‘self-efficacy’). This means you’re more likely to have faith in your ability to succeed in other situations. (Maybe now you can run that half-marathon, or apply for that promotion!) Researchers have found that confidence in and of itself can be a big predictor of success. So little wins achieved through helping others can build on each other over time to produce bigger and better results in your life.

9. Not helping can stress you out.

Not helping when you know you should can actually lead to greaterstress. Researchers have used experiments to determine that being stingy drives the release of cortisol, which is a physiological sign of stress. So on top of not getting the benefits of helping, by abstaining from helping you might even further taxing your system.

10. Helping builds your resume.

From a practical standpoint, helping activities usually generate experiences and skills to put on your resume. This can directly contribute to your efforts to land other volunteer or professional roles. It also shows you’re a caring, well-rounded person who can contribute in a variety of settings.
So if you’re still debating whether it’s worth taking some time out of your busy schedule to help others, the answer is a resounding ‘yes’! It’s ok to start small so you don’t feel over committed. You can easily grow your helping over time as your situation, capacity and abilities allow. But by starting today, you can get a jump start on feeling better, living longer, growing your skills and enriching your quality of life.

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